The Dark Knight Rises

In a year of superhero movies, it is definitely the job a director to make their movie stand out against the others that are playing, or have played earlier in the year. Christopher Nolan took on this task by releasing the conclusion to his dark trilogy of Batman flicks this summer, and I am satisfied to say he delivered, for the most part. The Dark Knight Rises is easily the best film out of the three, it's main problem is it takes entirely too long to get it to that point. At a run-time of almost 3 hours, you go into the film expecting to see quite a bit of Batman-style action, all while developing an enticing story- something that Nolan has excelled at in his previous two Batman endeavors. However, the film makes the 2 hours and 45 minutes you're watching the film feel like you've sat there for nearly four hours. The actual character of Batman appears in the movie for maybe a total of 45 minutes of the total run-time, which makes for an uninteresting amount of Bruce Wayne being a broken down man. The story takes place eight years after the events of The Dark Knight, and Wayne has taken to being a hermit who no one has seen in the entire eight years. Batman has also gone missing and people are starting to take notice of the coincidence between the two (well, except Commissioner Gordon that is). Wayne receives a visit from CatWoman (played rather fantastically by Anne Hathaway I might add) who convinces the bat to don his cape again and beat the baddies...the only problem? Bane. He puts a stop to Batman and takes over Gotham while Wayne sits in a cell and watches....for another hour and a half. During that time the story weaves and develops into a fairly generic "let's take over the city" story line, but then Wayne decides he needs to take down Bane and attempts to escape his mental and physical prison. That's when things get interesting. The story evolves past that of a superhero movie and onto some damn fine storytelling. As I mentioned earlier, it is easily the best of the three Nolan Batman films...but it takes over half the movie to get to the point. The movie could have easily been cut down some and still had the same impact near the ending- which is one of the best endings to a trilogy I've seen- if not ever than certainly in a long, long time. If you had told me going into the film that I'd tear up at a Batman movie I'd call you crazy (thanks, Michael Cane). Overall, if you're a fan of the caped crusader and/or Christopher Nolan I highly recommend you check this one out- it is well worth the wait to get to the good parts of the film when everything comes together. 4 out of 5.

Sucker-Punch

I try very hard to not be hard on movies- I love them. I enjoy criticizing them some of the time, but to be truly hard on a movie is just something I don't like to do. Then I come to movies like Sucker-Punch. I have never been a Zack Snyder fan, and this movie sure didn't change my opinion at all. First things first, this movie is very pretty to look at. The visual aspects of this movie are very eye-catching, and intriguing to watch. That being said, they can get old and taxing after two hours of watching them. Near the end of the movie there's a scene where every...single...action is carried out in slow motion. I found myself almost shouting "WHY" at the TV while watching the scene, it got old super-fast. Second, is the story. While watching this movie I had to have a friend (who loves the movie, mind you) explain to me what happened...the whole damn time! I feel that I should be able to figure out what exactly is happening in a movie while I'm watching it and not have to have everything explained to me- I didn't even have this much trouble understanding Highlander! It really killed a lot of the enjoyment of watching the movie for me. Conceptually, this movie is cool- seeing her "dance" in a second-reality-that's-not-really-reality turning into an action sequence in a third-reality-that-is-STILL-not-reality (like I said, confusing) was a very interesting concept- as was the whole "these realities aren't what's really happening" concept- I just found it thoroughly confusing. To be honest, it made me skeptical of watching Inception for fear that I'll get confused watching it as well. If you like Zack Snyder, action movies, or even shiny visuals this is the one for you- however if none of the above is you, you may not want to watch.

2 out of 5.

The Smurfs

I'll be honest- I did not go into The Smurfs with high expectations. After Hollywood butchered the lovable bear that is Yogi, my expectations were roughly the same, expecting The Smurfs to be completely massacred. I was pleasantly surprised- for the most part. I enjoyed the movie and it had many enjoyable, laughable, and heart-warming moments presented in a very family-friendly atmosphere. The Smurfs tells the story of The Smurfs and their archenemy Gargamel being sucked into New York City through a vortex in the Smurf Village. They run into Neil Patrick Harris' character Patrick (convenient, no?) as Clumsy Smurf falls into his box-o-makeup goods. The Smurfs then begin to try and find their way home and showing Patrick how to not miss his life all while trying to avoid Gargamel. Hank Azaria was quite perfect in his role of Gargamel, though portraying him a bit more daft than his typical self from the show. The Smurfs themselves were well cast too, save Papa Smurf who sounded like an Aslan the Lion wannabe and made the whole character seem a lot rougher and bolder than he was originally. Overall, if you're looking for a good, clean family flick than The Smurfs is right up your alley, but if you're into constant action with things blowing up, than you're probably better off checking out the latest Michael Bay flick.

3.5 out of 5

X-Men: First Class

When this movie was anounced I hadn't planned to go see it, until I saw the trailer. Once I saw the trailer my opinion changed. The movie seemed like it was going to be a breath of fresh air that the X-Men series really needed in order to respike my interest in it. After "The Last Stand" I had given up. "Wolverine" wasn't horrible, it just seemed like a movie trying to expand the profits while loosly fitting in with the comics. This movie changes that. Much how "The Dark Knight" has changed how people view Batman, "X-Men: First Class" can change how you can view X-Men. The cast is very well put together, and fit almost every character that has appeared in previous X-Men movies. The deal with this movie is that it is a prequel to everything that has ever been done (X-Men movie related-wise). It is the backstory of Charles Xavier and and Erik Lehnsherr (better known as Magneto). It shows how they discovered each other, as well as their own mutant powers all while attempting to show that mutants are not people to be feared. The adventure that unfolds will leave you hanging on to every turn that the movie takes you on, through hilarious cameos (Hugh Jackman may have won the best cameo in a movie award for me), and fun-to-watch action sequences. The movie is well put together and, while slightly inconsistant with both comics and the other movies, is very enjoyable to watch. I'd recommend it to the general movie goer looking for a good action flick and to the comic book nerd. You shouldn't be disappointed.

4.5 out of 5

The Hangover, Part 2

Tasteless, profane, and no limits. That was the formula that made up The Hangover, quite possibly the biggest comedy hit almost ever. I enjoyed the first part of the series quite well and found myself laughing frequently. However, when I heard that the second part would be coming out I rolled my eyes- another Hollywood sequel that didn't need to happen. Against my better judgment, I went in order to prove myself wrong- and didn't. This movie is indeed another Hollywood sequel that did not need to be made. Storywise, there is only so much you can do with the same kind of premise as the first movie- the guys party so hard they don't remember anything and find out they did some ridiculous things, including lose a member of their party. Look no further than the story of the first one to see the story of the second. This time Stu is getting married and the guys decide to have a calm bachlor's bonfire. When they wake up the next morning they're shaved, tatooed, and missing Stu's fiancè's brother. They then travel around Bangkok in order to find him and piece together the night. The jokes go to places that did not need to be travelled to in many instances causing me to merely shake my head in disbelief. Now, that's not to say the movie isn't funny- I found myself laughing quite a bit, it just is a completely different type of humor than the first one, though the same type of stuff is included. If you are a complete die-hard fan of the first Hangover you will probably enjoy this one a lot, but if you, like me, rolled your eyes at the thought of a sequel you probably should avoid this one.

2.5 out of 5

Black Swan

A very cleverly weaved tale that shows a fairly accurate depiction of behind-the-scenes of major dance companies. Having been in that kind of scene before even just for an audition you get a vibe that is very strongly similar to much of the goings-on in Black Swan. Not to say that all companies are the same, but it does exist. Portman's portrayal of the ballerina Nina was fairly believable, though sometimes cliché. She crafted a very self-conscious girl who wanted to be perfect and, for the most part, it worked. The shock to me was just how much of a "thriller" this movie is. I was not prepared for half of the things this movie throws at you and soon I was witnessing blood, cursing, and some moments intended to startle (one at which I did jump). Parts of the movie are rather grotesque and truly disturbing to witness and others are witty and clever to watch. The actual dancing aspect of the movie is well done, though mostly focused on Portman through interesting camera angles in order to show facial expressions and hear the small talk between the performers on stage. The movie was rather enjoyable and I'd recommend it for those looking to branch out of the ordinary and witness an interesting look inside of a "beautiful" production, however it is certainly not recommended for the faint of heart.

4 out of 5

The Return of Murphy!

Alright so here is a new update on Murphy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DUh1WnrquUI

[copy and paste in the URL to view]

She's back and better than ever, featuring a new head and new pyro effects. Fast forward to about 5 minutes into that video to see the footage. Her magnificent return has been long awaited since September. At one point there were rumors of her not returning from the higher ups at Disney, however Murphy has returned and she is here to stay!

Halloween: Disney Style

It's come to that time of year again in the Disney parks all over the world- Halloween. Every Disney park worldwide has their own different festival for Halloween, all featuring unique and fascinating features. Disney World in Florida features Mickey's Not-So-Scary Halloween Party for the youngsters (for an additional entrance fee) which offers Trick-or-Treating spots for the kids, special character meet-and-greets, and two spectacular shows. The first is the Villain's Mix-and-Mingle, a 7 minute high energy dance show followed by a chance to meet the villains. During the show Maleficent welcomes the guests and gets the show under way and then other Disney villains join her on stage (and new this year is the amazing Dr. Facilier from Princess and the Frog). The show gets better every year, this year featuring the entire front of the stage being engulfed in green flames, flash pots, and a much bigger pyrotechnic finale. Then once the end comes near Magic Kingdom presents Hallo-Wishes, a fireworks show featuring new versions of several classic Disney songs. I wouldn't pay extra to get in I don't think, but it would be well worth it if you have small children.
Disneyland in California features similar things including the mind-boggling, eye-popping Halloween Screams fireworks show, however new this year it's only being shown at the Halloween party which costs extra which has many people upset, but it's well worth a watch. Seeing Zero from Nightmare Before Christmas fly over Sleeping Beauty's castle is fantastic and the effects that happen all over the sky will blow your mind!
Hong Kong Disneyland features a pretty unique to-do which in itself wants to make me hop on a plane. The Glow in the Park parade is amazing just to see video of. The leader of the parade is a float with a giant animatronic Jack Skellington atop it but he can bend over to look at the audience! All the other floats feature similar things, Maleficent rides with Chernabog from Fantasia and it is simply amazing. They then have the Nightmare in the Sky fireworks show, which isn't as impressive as you would expect from Hong Kong Disneyland but still would be worth a watch live.
Tokyo Disney and Disneysea have multiple shows that are simply incredible. Mysterious Masquerade in Disneysea features all the classic characters trying to figure out what artifact is possessing guests and it is interesting to watch. The Tokyo Disneyland has a parade/show combo where the villains take over the Disney good-guys' Halloween bash and it's full of lots of fire.
All in all Disney knows how to throw a party, and if you get a chance to visit any of these places I'd highly recommend it!

Murphy's Law

Last summer in Disneyland, Fantasmic! was supposed to be graced with the addition of a 45 foot tall fire-breathing dragon. Well after the passing of the Summer Nighttastic even on September 1st, the dragon finally appeared after an entire summer of technical difficulties. The night she premiered the aptly named Murphy (after Murphy's Law that anything that can go wrong, will go wrong) she didn't even breathe fire, but she was just as magnificent as ever. The following night she breathed fire and it was a magnificent sight to behold. However, during Saturday (the 28th)'s performance of the show, Murphy again proved to us that the law remains true and collapsed during the show


This is the scene now:


Murphy is now out of the show indefinitely until they can figure out all that's wrong with her. See Disney hired an outside company (that typically takes care of their animatronic figures) to build Murphy, however this has proven to be a mistake. I can only hope that Murphy has a speedy return to the show and that Disney doesn't decide to just remove her permanently.

King Kong 360-3D!

As many theme park goers know, Universal Studios Hollywood had a giant fire back in 2008 and lost the beloved King Kong attraction that was featured on the Backlot Tour. Well good news and bad news: Good news: Kong is now back! Bad news: It's not a new animatronic situation, it's a 3D movie that your tram rides through. I'm not sure how I feel about this because everything that happens on the tour is supposed to be real and in your face and riding through a 3D movie just does not seem as in-my-face as a giant animatronic Kong coming after you. Plus do you just hold the glasses with you the entire tram ride and use them that one time? It seems more of an inconvenience to me but we'll see how it plays out I suppose, the attractions open now and I'm hoping to see some video soon.

3-D!

Ok, so I know it's the "in thing" right now but the 3D movie fad has now gotten entirely too old. Seeing a 3D movie used to mean something to me- when you go to places like Disney World/Land and Universal Studios they're 3D movies truly immerse you in the movie- characters literally leap off the screen, effects happen to your seats and around the theater, and the whole experience is simply mind-blowing. However, now Hollywood has it's hands on "3D" technology, which consists of making the movie appear to be off of the screen because you're wearing silly looking glasses that you paid 3-4 bucks extra for. There's nothing immersive at all. The filmmakers simply add a layer to the film to make it seem "different" but if you take the glasses off you simply see the 2D version those smart movie-goers saw who paid 3 dollars less than you. That's another thing- you shouldn't be able to do that if it's truly 3D. Go to Disney World and watch Mickey's Philharmagic and take your 3D glasses off- you can't focus and everything is distorted. The glasses take you to the world of the movie. The 3D movies that come out in every movie theater across the globe take you to the concession stand to buy some popcorn because you're bored of the lack of 3D effects. It's a ploy to make money and now everyone's doing it- Disney is re-releasing both Beauty and the Beast and The Lion King in 3D later this year because of the fad. This is a disgrace, and a sure sign the 3D fad has gone too far...

Avatar, Part 3 (A.K.A. Yet Another Rant on James Cameron)

Ok so James Cameron has officially made me angry! Ok, so many people will agree he has done this before now but now it has gone too far- yet again! Avatar 3D is STILL in theatres, but the movie has been on DVD for a month. WHY?!?!?!?! The movie is not so spectacular that it just needs to always be in theatres. That's ridiculous. Especially now that we can all buy it so we can watch it whenever we want...why should we go pay $12 to go see it in 3D when it's not all that more spectacular in 3D. Oh and also a commercial for a special type of TV came on today boasting that James Cameron's Avatar was a movie that broke ground for several types of film-making...this my friends is actually incorrect. The same technology was used in ALL 3 of the Lord of the Rings movies- and the thing is the LOTR movies looked more believable than Avatar- the mix of CGI in the LOTR looked stunning but Avatar's mix of CGI and humans just looked fake. Everything was supposed to be flawlessly mixed, but it wasn't. Now the movie itself is not horrible, just not perfect like everyone makes it out to be. James Cameron- quit now, please?

Public Restrooms

Ok so this is a post I really should not have to make but obviously here at EKU I do... Men's restrooms- a place for men to take care of their business, clean it, and get out. It is NOT a place to take care of your business and allow everyone else to observe it. I seriously went into a restroom today and found every single urinal full of that ever-so-lovable bodily fluid. I went through and flushed them all...was it that hard? No! If we all took two more seconds in the restroom to do what our father's taught us at age three then the restroom's not only would be more pleasant to look at, but they wouldn't smell like pee either- which is just disgusting to have blasted in your face as you open the door to relieve yourself. Let's grow up, boys...please?

Disney Deaths

So far us Disney Dorks have been hit really hard with 3 tragic deaths of three iconic Disney legends since the May of last year. On May 18th last year Wayne Allwine- a.k.a. the voice of Mickey Mouse- passed away. Speculations have of course risen that Disney has already begun looking for a replacement (of course released like the next day) but so far I have heard nothing. Mickey is still silent for the time being. Of course the second death was slightly more tragic- Walt's nephew, the famous, Roy Disney passed away on December 16th. Of course one of the main names left in the Disney family this was an incredibly depressing thing to hear, though everything stayed basically the same as far as Disney's staff, so that's good. Finally the third Disney Death in recent times is Mr. Eddie Carroll passed away April 6th. Carroll of course being the voice of Jiminy Cricket since 1973 will dearly be missed, especially in the theme parks where he tended to reign more prominent. There has been a lot of tragedy in Disney of late and I hope everything will work out. And things are indeed looking up because June 11th is the premiere of Disneyland's World of Color show at California Adventure, so be on the look out for more info on that coming soon.

Harry Potter World

Ok, so I have really mixed feelings about this upcoming section of Unversal Orlando's Islands of Adventure Park. Near the back of The Lost Continent section of the park, they are set to open Harry Potter World this summer. Now honestly my feelings about this are mostly negative unfortunetly- does Harry Potter really deserve his own mini-theme park? I think not. He's got 7 books and 8 movies and about a million video game counter-parts and even multiple book spin-offs...he does not need a theme park. A lot of people's response to this would be: what about Mickey Mouse? He has all that crap, why does he have his own park- my answer is this: he doesn't. He is a character at a Disney theme park, just because he happens to be the main emphasis does not mean he has his own theme park. Now I admit I enjoyed Harry Potter for a while, but then his books got so damn boring I quit reading them and I haven't bothered to see the last couple movies because the books were so boring I saw no point in paying money to see them acted out. My other main negative thing is they are tearing down the park's iconic roller-coaster in order to build a Harry Potter related one. That's right coaster maniacs- Dueling Dragons is going to be no longer- they're getting rid of it to theme it to Harry Potter dragons and are starting from scratch. This you just don't f***ing do my friends- that coaster was world-renouned for it's amazing-ness and they are just tearing it down for Harry F***ing Potter. WOOO! NOT! Now the good thing (only one of them!) is the technology that's going into the exploring Hogwarts ride is phenomenal- it's a robotic arm that can flip you, twist you, shake you, and essentially make you fly without an airplane and that is pretty awesome- so that's one (count it- ONE) thing I'm looking forward to with this "world." I'm not sure how J.K. Rowling got the Harry Potter theme park contract but it's not really something I'm looking forward to a whole lot...

Relationships and Love

Not a very dorky subject, but one that is going though my mind nonetheless. Why do we have them? If someone you love just leaves after two years you're crushed and they move on. Why do we allow ourselves to do that? I'm not sure but I think that it should be simpler. I'm also not sure how to make it simpler. It just has to be hard I guess, and that's not fair. We get into these relationships, knowing it'll probably end, but then we get so in love and so sure it'll last forever and then it's gone and our original thought comes true, and it hurts bad. All I can say is "love songs suck and fairy-tales aren't true" -thanks to Bowling For Soup!!

Movies on TV

So riddle me this: why does watching a movie on TV take 45 minutes to an hour longer than simply watching the DVD? Commercials. That's why. But why are they so many commercials? Why do TV channels find it necesary to play 45 minutes of 30 second long advertisements? I know it's technically to "make money" but if they're really that hard-pressed for money, should they even be trying to play that movie? Should they even have a TV channel at all?! Snow White and the Seven Dwarves came on TV tonight...it is 83 minutes long; the TV version was 120. Lord of the Rings 3 is 3 and a half hours long by itself...the TV version was 5 hours!! WTF WHY?!? I guess it's just how life works and I'll probably never understand...

Avatar, Part 2

OK WTF PEOPLE?!? I just heard tell that James Cameron not only is planning the sequal to Avatar (as I mentioned in the last Avatar post) but now is writing a novel that is going to be the prequel to the movie. Seriously what the f*** is there to tell? "um...it's the future...my brother died...now I'm on a new planet..." That's like a one paragraph prequel...AND IT WAS IN THE MOVIE! Ok I didn't really have all that much of a problem with this movie until now, it has gone way too far.

Snow, part 2

Ok so here in Kentucky Mother Nature constantly shows her love for the Ohio Valley by blessing us with different weather conditions seemingly every few minutes. Now we are back under lots of snow all over the state- classes in college were canceled yesterday and today they were on a two hour delay (only it's not really a two hour delay, but that's a different rant). Honestly though it's not even all that bad out...a couple inches and a bit of a wind and that's all...roads are clear and sidewalks are mostly clear as well. I just kinda wish sometimes that good ol' Mother Nature could make her mind. And also...why does it have to be cold to snow?! I LOVE snow! I HATE the cold! Snow is so beautiful, but why does it have to be so doggone cold in order for it to happen? Oh well there's nothing I can do I suppose...

Avatar

Ok so honestly can someone tell me why the hell this movie is so good?!?!? I have seen it twice at this point and I still cannot see why people love it so much. The story was simply Dances with Wolves meet Pocohontas in space and the characters even looked like overgrown smurf versions of the Pocohontas characters. WTF?! The visual effects were ok I guess, other than the fact that so much of the movie was so obviously C.G. that it probably would have gone over in my head if the whole movie had been C.G. rather than trying to mix human people into the mix too because half the time the "humans" were computer generated as well. Now it's up for countless academy awards an I want to know WHY?!?!?!? There is nothing fabulous about this movie...it is simply OK. Plus there are thousands of reports stating that people want to kill themselves because they are either not on Pandora or not Na'vi. Ok once movies take people to this point I frown upon the human race...IT'S A MOVIE!!!! It's NOT real! Sheesh! Ok so honestly now, though it won't sound like it, i don't hate this movie, I simply find it OK, a good way to waste 3 hours of my life with mild entertainment...however I simply cannot fathom why planet Earth has gone completely ape over it. James Cameron, well done I suppose because you have topped all of your Titanic landmarks...you gonna try and top them in Avatar 2? Hey, that'd be a good sequel name: "Avatar 2: Top This, F***ers!!"